What it's all about...

I'm a 39 year old wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt & friend. That should tell you who I'll be writing about most of the time.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Counting days

I feel like that's all we're doing around here lately. The kids have 6 days of school left...Madonna tickets go on sale in 10 days...22 days until we leave for California. The last two weekends have been busy, and the next 3 before we leave will be as well. I am starting to panic and feel very anxious when I think about it all. I have not taken any pictures since the de-bracing of my boy. I think I have been somewhat depressed, probably for a couple of months. I'm not familiar with depression, so I kept thinking that I couldn't be because I am not always sad. But I don't think that it is a continual sadness, so maybe???

Anyway, the lowdown on recent events:
Mother's Day was nice. My Willow dog waited until almost 7:00 to wake me up to let her outside. So much for sleeping in! Well, I guess it was since I get up at 5:45 during the week and 6:00 on Saturdays. Shell & I exchanged gifts while the kids were sleeping. They slept in until almost 10. I got Shell a Pancake Puff Pan (she saw it on an infomercial), and the Martina McBride Live CD/DVD. She got me a gift certificate to get a manicure and pedicure before our trip. She got one for my mom too. She's awesome like that sometimes. After the kids got up, we made Pancake Puffs and it actually worked the way it did on the infomercial. I was so glad. And they were really good too. We went over to my parents for barbecued steaks, twice baked potatoes and salad. Yum! I LOVE BBQ steak. That was pretty much it for the day.
Last weekend was a blur. There was no 7:30am Karate review class on Saturday, so we got to sleep in. Willow woke me up at 7:00, but then I went back to sleep until almost 10. It was lovely. My girl had spent the night at her friend's house the night before, and after the boy woke up he decided that he wanted to meet them at the park. So off he went. They all trampled back just in time to get ready to go to a birthday party. That night, Shell & I went to see A Chorus Line. It was so great. I was a little nervous because she is so in love with the movie and I wasn't sure if the stage show would live up to that. But it did and she loved it as well. The kids stayed the night at Dana's, so after the show we went to Denver Diner to eat and then went home. Sunday was a rough day. After picking up the kids, we headed to my parent's house. Their Asia dog had become considerably worse in the last couple of weeks and they decided that the best thing for her was to put her to sleep. My mom asked me to go with my dad, she knew she just couldn't be there for it. After Shell & the kids had a chance to love on her, we headed to the vet. It was heartbreaking to see my dad so upset. She was an amazing dog and everybody loved her. I told my mom that after she was gone, she seemed more at peace then she hadbeen in a long time. It was a good thing, but so hard. Shell & the kids had stayed with my mom while we were gone, so after my dad & I returned, we just hung out for awhile. My girl had a very hard time with it, she is very sensitive when it comes to animals and although she understood why, it still hurt. I am glad that she is exposed to these things, but her tears broke my heart. I hurt for her still.
Moving on... I got our Wicked tickets in the mail. I am so excited to take the kids to see this while we are in CA. Eric is going too. We are not going to tell them about it, at all. They will be told that we are going to a nice restaurant for dinner with Uncle Eric and then just end up at the theater instead. I can't wait! To be honest, it's the one part of this trip that I am really looking forward to. Well, actually I am very much looking forward to seeing everyone, I just wish I was going to be doing it in a different body. It's so irritating to me that I have obviously known about this trip for months and yet have done nothing to try to lose weight. Quite the opposite actually. On too many occasions to count I have woke up in the morning telling myself that today is the day that I'm going to start. And then I end up at Taco Bell or McDonalds for lunch. And I wasn't eating a salad either. I am angry and frustrated and disappointed and sad. There are only 3 weeks left before we leave, and the cute clothes that we spent a fortune on last spring when I went out there don't fit me now. I don't know what I am going to wear this time. I don't know what else to say. So I'm done on that topic for now. Because really, what else is there to say?

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