Since the news of my cousin's passing, it's been a roller coaster of emotions and events around here. The service was last Thursday and it was really beautiful. His daughter sang a song (I still don't know how. I was a sobbing mess, she did great.) and I visited with family from out of town who I hadn't seen in quite awhile. Shell stayed home with the kids, so I went with my parents. We helped transport food & flowers back to the house and then stayed there visiting until I had to get home so Shell could leave for work. It was really hard to go through all the emotions of the day without her, and since I walked in as she walked out I really missed her that night. Last Sunday we had lunch at White Fence Farm with my parents, my grandma, my mom's cousin & her husband and the wife and kids of my cousin who passed. It was a really nice afternoon, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't glad to be home that evening with my wife cuddling and watching movies. The fear that something could happen to her is with me constantly now, and I find myself struggling at times to get past that and function normally. I guess it's good that I'm not taking her for granted, but I found myself with tears in my eyes this morning when I left for work because we had argued and I couldn't stop thinking that if something happened to her while I was gone, it would be the last time I had with her. Couple that with the fact I was just irritated by what we were arguing about and I couldn't decide if I was happy or sad to be leaving! Oh, and I'm going to start my period soon so I'd better hold on tight because this could be a bumpy ride!
We are going to see Rent tonight and I am beside myself with excitement. I feel like I've been waiting to see this forever and watching the movie just intensified that. Plus, the actors who played Roger and Mark in the movie and original stage production are in this tour as well. And our seats are in the THIRD ROW! Oh, I can't WAIT to get off work so I can go home and shower, drop the kids off with my parents and head to the theater.
And speaking of tickets, Shell surprised me with tickets to see the 1964: The Tribute band play at Red Rocks in August. I went with my dad 2 years ago and last year we took my boy and we had such a great time. So we're going again, the three of us with the shared love for The Beatles.
This week at work has been a challenge. We had Internet problems Monday through Thursday, so today is the first day I've been able to access my work for a full day. I am so behind on entry, it's not pretty. I've considered coming in this weekend to get more caught up. I'm still thinking about it.
The only other news is that the kids saw the dentist this week for their routine cleanings & exams and my boy has his first cavity. So he'll go back in 2 weeks to get that filled and have his last remaining baby tooth pulled.
Oh, one more thing. We got the kids last report cards in the mail this week and they both had straight A's! And they will be in honors classes next year, so middle school, here we come!
Monday, June 1, 2009
I am an LGBT family. What to write for the Blogging for LGBT Families Day? What if I just wrote about what life was like in my house over the past weekend? Would that be enough? I hope so...because that's what this is. Life in my LGBT family is not spectacular, not shocking, not all that interesting really. It's probably extremely similar to life in a "normal" family. I guess to some, that's shocking enough.
This past weekend was not typical for my family, and I am very thankful for that. Shell got home from work around 6:30 that morning and we snuggled for a while and fell asleep. My mom called at 8:00 with bad news. Her cousin's son (the one who I turned to about our TV issue) had passed away early that morning from a massive heart attack. He was only 47 years old. To say this was unexpected would be a gross understatement. He left behind his wife, his 18 year old daughter and 16 year old son. I wasn't close to them, but my heart aches to think of how his wife must feel.
We already had made plans to take the kids to see Up that afternoon, so off to the theater we went. It was a really great movie, but sad too. Shell & I found ourselves crying & laughing, so I'd call it good for adults too.
After the movie, I went to pay my respects. It was very difficult. Tears flowed easily and I was glad to be able to show my support. The service will be on Thursday, and I am expecting to be able to attend. I was happy to hear that they are donating his organs and I hope that knowing he will continue to help others will help in their healing. Needless to say, I spent the rest of Saturday night being very clingy and wanting to be thisclose to Shell. I couldn't stop thinking of how it would be to lose her so suddenly and it just broke my heart. It was a rough evening.
Sunday started so good and just got better. Our computer arrived on Friday, so my friend from work came over Sunday to get it all set up for us. It was very exciting. I also took the dogs to the groomer, so I didn't have to deal with them barking every time he moved. Made it so much better. We made fried rice and egg rolls for dinner and had a very relaxing evening.
I've also been doing Wii Fit all week, only missing one day. I really, really like it. I'm going to try the Wii Active tonight. I've heard it's quite a workout.
And thanks to Facebook, and the death in our family, I've reconnected with my cousin who I've had little to no contact with since we were much younger. My grandma (mom's mother) was married 3 times and had 4 children. None of them are very close. Between them, there are 7 kids (I am the second oldest of those) and these cousins are not close either. Never have been, due to our parents distance I'm sure. Unfortunately, the "family news" we get is usually akin to gossip as it's pretty one-sided and subject to the interpretations of the person sharing the news. To try to break this cycle before it infects our kids, my older cousin & I are trying to fill in the gaps with our own lives and tell our stories first-hand. I'm glad, as it's always made me sad that I'm not close to any of my cousins, on either side of my family.